Should I have chosen a different path?

Photo by Maria Teneva on Unsplash

The root of the problem

I think it’s ultimately because I am comparing myself to the people around me. Or to the people I see in daily life. Those are two vastly different things mind. Let me explain:

A solution

The trick though seems to be to extend that line of thinking. To not just focus on that one thing but look at the whole. Instead of comparing a single, random page at different places in two books, at least look at the blurb. That way, you can see where you are doing well, you can see how your goals might not line up so their path would have led you in the wrong direction. You can see how much further along their story they are. And maybe you can empathise and feel good about their accomplishments and not what this feeling is. Which is, let's be honest, envy.

Example?

Let me give an example. I have a flatmate who just got promoted at his job. He is now a DevOps Engineer, and he works at his dream company. His dream job, at his dream company, and he got a promotion. That’s awesome, on the one hand. On the other hand, damn, I wish I could be like that. Why aren’t I? What could I have done differently?

This is not the solution.

When I think this through, I can come up with even more reasons why we are on different paths. But it's a dangerous route to go down; it can get nasty. The best thing to do would be to take a deep breath, appreciate what you have, work towards your own goals and not give a shit what other people are doing. If they’re doing well, good for them, you do you. But I found this is a good practice for when that feeling creeps in.

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